How do you feel when your child is glued to a screen?

How does it go when you say it’s time to stop?

Do you ever wonder what a brilliant, creative being she might become if she didn’t spend so long online?

Fun good; screens bad

I’ve been quite vocal about my dislike of screens.

But my children still get screen time.

And I hate it.

I see the damage it does. I see the opportunities it denies them. But I give it to them anyway.

Or rather, I did.

We made a change. We broke the habit. And, as you know, habits are hard to break. But you can do it. And this mini-series will show you how.

My children still get time on the computer. But we went cold turkey for a while. It showed them another way and opened a window in their minds to the possibilities - and they haven’t looked back.

Now screens are back, but it’s limited and under control. Above all, everyone accepts the rules. They see why they are important.

My story

Like you, I’ve always known screens were awful. And I did my best to keep them out of my children’s lives, apart from the occasional episode of Thomas the Tank Engine while I was preparing lunch. How could anything that happened on the Island of Sodor be bad?

Memories of my own childhood convinced me that screens weren’t necessary. A bit of space and the freedom to make a guilt-free mess were all you needed for a happy time.

But I lost my first company. Liquidation is tough. I had to relaunch without any money and bring up four young children whilst working from home. My wife was at university, training to be a doctor. And the children are older now. They don’t just accept what I give them. They have opinions. :(

So screens crept in.

And, the worst part is, they helped.

I had deadlines. I had bills. I needed a break.

But half an hour on a screen turns into an hour, turns into two. And now the children are hungry. I can see that they’ll be dysregulated if I turn things off.

Hmmm… Looks like I’ve painted myself into a corner.

Your story

Maybe you find yourself in the same corner, surrounded by paint. It would take an enormous leap to get out and you’re not sure you can do it. Get it wrong and you’ve created a great big sticky mess.

But what’s it like in that corner?

Here’s how I felt - and this is coming from someone whose job it is to keep children happily engaged through independent fun:

• My children were becoming dependent on screens for entertainment. When they were bored, they didn’t know how to play on their own. Or rather, they lost their confidence and belief. They weren’t willing to try. And these were the 100 Toys children, the children who had had every advantage, who knew how to play.
• I was feeling more stressed. I found myself managing screen time constantly - setting limits, dealing with the meltdowns, negotiating when it was time to turn them off.
• Family time was suffering. Meals were shorter, everyone wanted to get back to their screen. Those quiet, connected moments were disappearing. Bedtime stories, the best thing I have ever done with my children, the thing that gives me most joy, stopped. We were late getting upstairs. The gentle wind-down at the end of the day had become a game of whack-a-mole, trying to get over-excited, sometimes stressed children calm and into bed.

The screen-time habit wasn’t just affecting my children—it was affecting all of us.

Walking over wet paint is going to ruin your shoes. But there’s nothing to be done. We are where we are.

You didn’t like those shoes anyway, did you?

The way out

If you’ve ever tried to give up coffee or sugar or anything else, you know that just cutting down is almost impossible. It takes a huge amount of willpower.

Better to take it away completely and reset.

And that’s what this series is about. Taking a break, dealing with the objections and showing your child that it’s fun out there, in the screen-free world.

Over the next five days, we’re going to take small but powerful steps to break the screen-time habit in your house. You don’t need to make big, drastic changes overnight. This isn’t about feeling guilty or getting it ‘perfect’ from day one. It’s about finding a balance that works for your family and taking back control, one step at a time.

Where we’re going

Here’s what you can expect over the next few days:

• Day 2: We’ll dive into why going cold turkey is the key to resetting your child’s relationship with screens. Trust me - it’s easier than it sounds, and I’ll show you how to do it successfully.
• Day 3: You’ll learn how to create a screen-free, enabling environment that naturally encourages play, creativity, and independence - so screens won’t even feel necessary.
• Day 4: We’ll talk about building your child’s boredom muscle - and why boredom is essential for developing creativity, patience, and problem-solving skills.
• Day 5: We’ll look at the importance of replacing bad habits with good ones, using James Clear’s Atomic Habits approach to make screen-free play a lasting part of your routine.
• By the end of this series, you’ll have the tools to help your child rediscover the joy of play, reconnect your family, and find a healthier, more balanced relationship with screens.

Today’s challenge: track your screen time

Before we start making any changes, I want you to do something that really helped me: just notice how much screen time is happening in your home.

Here’s what to do:

1. Choose one day to track your family’s screen use.
2. Jot down every time someone uses a screen - whether it’s the TV, a tablet, a phone, or any other device. Don’t worry about changing anything yet - just observe.
3. Pay attention to the moments when you turn to screens. Are they being used as a reward? A distraction? A way to calm things down?
4. Involve your children. Ask them to notice when they’re using screens, too. It’s a fun way for them to become more aware of their own habits.

If you’re like me, you probably won’t actually track it.

It’s obvious. I know how much screen time my children have. I don’t need to write it down. I already know it’s too much.

OK, that’s fine. But do you know what finally made me make a change? I’d bought a Nintendo Switch for the children so that I could control their screen use. It has a timer. You can set it to switch off automatically after an hour. It saved me from being the bad guy.

Time to turn it off. Stop now. Please stop! Why isn’t anyone listening to me…?

Now it just turns off.

Not my fault. Don’t blame me. We agreed you can have an hour and now the time’s up.

It depersonalises and de-escalates.

But the real reason we got the Switch is that it got the children off the television. They always seemed to end up watching something inappropriate, even with the strictest parental controls.

One day, I was on the Nintendo Family Sharing app, changing some settings when I came across a ‘screen use’ tab.

Total time: 205 hours.

205 hours?

I had been lying to myself. If the device hadn’t tracked the usage, I would have had no idea. My mind was made up in that moment.

Something had to change.

Why it matters

By tracking screen use for a day, you’ll start to see patterns. You’ll notice the times when screens seem to sneak in - and maybe even why. This is the first step toward making changes that last.

Day #2

Tomorrow, we’re going to talk about the next step: taking a break from screens completely. I know it sounds scary, but don’t worry - we’ll do it together. I’ll guide you through how to make it work for your family, and you’ll be amazed at the transformation that’s possible.

For now, just focus on today’s task. You’ve already taken the first step, and I’m here to help you every step of the way.

Warmest wishes,

Alexis

P.S. If your child’s screen use is high, try not to feel too guilty about it. We’ve all done it. It’s something we can fix. Simply tracking your family’s screen use is a powerful first step toward making lasting changes. You don’t have to write down exact numbers if you don’t want to. Make a mental note but try to be honest with yourself. It may be a big number, but that’s OK. If it’s 5 hours today and after the mini-series is over it’s down to 3, but you didn’t manage to spend a few days going cold turkey, you didn’t fail. You cut screen time by two hours a day. Think of all the play and learning that happened in that time. That’s two hours a day, 14 a week, 730 hours a year. How much does that add up to over a childhood? It’s enough time to learn an instrument, excel at sport, read a mountain of books - or just spend time doing the things you love.

P.P.S. Breaking the screen-time habit is part of the Screen-Free Saturdays. In case you missed it, you can read the launch email here. And if you're tempted by the entire project, you can join the Co-Conspirators for the early bird price of £29 until October 30th.